Pity the aptly-named Christopher Woods, an unfortunate fellow who had a health drink and woke the next day “with an erection that would not subside.”

Who needs a pill that will make you “harder than Chinese algebra” (in the words of the great comedian Robin Williams), when you can simply down a health drink that’s readily available at any US drugstore? It’s cheaper by far, and apparently lasts a lot longer too, though the overnight wait would rather ruin the mood.

I can only imagine the spam that will follow this one.